Monday, November 23, 2009

2009 AMAs... Musings

Where does one begin to wrap up last night's AMAs? Considering the award show included an embarrassing fall for JLo, Lady GaGa in a flesh tone shrimp costume and Adam Lambert engaging in staged fellatio... there is no one place to start, so I'm gonna jump right in.




JLo Goes Boom
Everyone was waiting for JLo's comeback performance, during which she actually "changed" costumes and slipped on a pair of Louboutins on stage. All seemed to go well, until she fell right on her million-dollar ass. Hats off to her though, after she got up (in a split second mind you) she didn't miss a beat. The mark of a true professional.




Lady GaGa Sleeps with the Fishes
Was her outfit supposed to be an exoskeleton or a shrimp? Either way, she should fire her costumer. That being said, she was, as usual, compelling to watch. Like a train wreck, I cannot take my eyes off her weird-ass performances. (Not to mention, for the 1st half of the performance I was sure she had a dildo crammed into her leotard. It turned out to be a strap on her costume.)


Whitney Wants You to Know She Won't Break
In what was basically the antihistamine of AMA performances, Whitney Houston talk-sang, stood completely still and yet managed to sweat it up like she ran a 5K. Yawn... if this was a comeback, she might wanna give it another try.



Adam Lambert is All Up in Your Face, Yo
Look, I'm no prude. And, by now you know I'm a huge advocate for gay rights. However, I do think that certain performances are better left for your paying customers than for prime time television. If you wanna S&M your way through a terrible song, fine. But do it at a not-for-prime time hour. Frankly, I think the risque performance was just a way to camouflage a terrible song with some shock value. Oh, and Adam...enough with the screaming. It's not 1987 and you're not Ronnie James Dio -- so stop it.

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