Friday, March 12, 2010

WTF was America thinking???

So disappointing.




Now, at least another week of listening to Tim (Mophead), Aaron (Stringbean), and Paige.

Tuesday, March 09, 2010

J & M's Oscars Fashion Rundown

Well, Melissa. Yet another Academy Awards under our belts. Last night there was a clear divide between best and worst dressed. The good, the bad and the frightfully ugly reared their heads. So, let's get to it and tear them new a-holes, shall we?

Joan and Melissa’s Best Dressed: Oscars 2010

Joan: I'm having a hard time narrowing down this category, so I'm going to cheat a little and mention my faves of the evening. In the shimmering/glimmering category, we have JLo, Amanda Seyfried, Cameron Diaz, and Sandra Bullock. (You know how hard it is for me to say Cameron Diaz looks good in anything, since she’s usually a total disaster, but last night she classed it up and proved her red carpet potential in spades. Lovely.) And I just love the detail on JLo’s and Seyfried’s gowns. I’d bet they’re the same designer, from the same line. If not – copycat, tsk tsk tsk. Last, I loved Sandra Bullock’s gown the more I looked at it last night. It was the perfect gown for her to win the Oscar in. She definitely improved since prior events, and doesn’t need to fire her stylist. Lucky him/her.






Melissa: My best dressed were Demi Moore and Maggie Gyllenhall. I loved that Maggie wore a richly colored/patterned gown instead of a lot of the paler colors we saw on the red carpet. I also liked that she didn’t wear a bell-shaped dress like a lot of the other ladies wore. I also really LOVED the color of Demi’s dress, it reminded me of a ballerina. And the layers and ruffles moved so nicely as she walked across the stage.




Joan: Oh, I just loved Demi's dress. Not a big fan of Maggie's dress –- I generally don't like prints on the red carpet. They just don't seem formal enough. I loved Anna Kendrick's gown, too. As well as Vera Farmiga’s and Queen Latifah’s. And I can’t not mention Carey Mulligan’s black pleated-sequined gown, Helen Mirren’s gorgeous silver number and Elizabeth Banks’ gorgeous gray gown. It was really a spectacular night. Loved all the ruffles and subtle details.







Melissa: I liked Carey Mulligan’s dress a lot although I felt that the mid-calf length in front was a little awkward but it wasn’t horrible. Omg, you know whose dress I didn’t like? And this person always looks spot-on? Kate Winslet. It was so boring and I felt that the draping on the bottom half of the dress was awkward. I felt like Anna Kendrick’s dress was too pale. I dunno, it got washed out into the background for me that it became almost forgettable.



Joan: I felt the same way about Kate Winslet's dress. It was like two different gowns. It just didn’t look right – but otherwise, she's gorgeous. Bitch. On to the worst dressed, shall we?


Joan and Melissa’s Worst Dressed: Oscars 2010

Joan: OK, you know I love him dearly – I’d actually like to have him cloned for my very own – but Robert Downey Jr looked like a total tool in his get up. But, I forgive him. Although, he still gets worst dressed man for me. Worst dressed woman, on the other hand is not so clear cut. There were a lot of contenders… namely, Diane Kruger. Who needs to stop wearing Chanel. I’m convinced that catastrophe was Chanel, unless I hear otherwise. It was gross on ever possible level.




Melissa: SJP. Oooooooof, that was Chanel Haute Couture and boy, oh boy, was it a big giant FAIL. There was nothing good about it. From the shapeless sack shape, to the awful color, to the weird neck strappy thing that was clearly choking her, the whole thing was a mess. I hated that bouffant on the back of her head and all the flyaways she had going on… did she ride in a convertible on her way there???



Joan: Lol. I just knew it. Karl considers her his muse. Diane Kruger almost exclusively wears Chanel! Which is probably why she couldn’t turn that dress down. Ooof. And you’re right about the hair. The only one with worse hair was…the other haute couture vintage mess: Sarah Jessica Parker. I applaud her for being a fashion horse and having the guts to wear what others wouldn’t. but, come on my dear – an ugly dress is an ugly dress – no matter how it was constructed or whose label it is. And on that note, I must bring up Charlize Theron…who wore Dior haute couture last night. The odd design on the front appeared to be two lavender hands grabbing her tits. Always classy.



Melissa: Oh my! That mess…. What was Charlize thinking??? I think a lot of these actresses were blinded by the HAUTE COUTURE labels and didn’t really think about how these gowns would look on them. Which is a shame cause they can all pull off pretty much anything and had to become victims to these frocks.

Joan: No, no they didn’t. I think they’re so honored to wear the label they forget how awful they look. But, unlike the kids’ story – this one doesn’t have a moral and keeps playing out without end. If I had to pick one worst dressed, I guess I’d go with Diane Kruger. At least the other two dresses had some redeeming qualities.

Melissa: Well, here we are at the end of another awards season. Always leave me a little misty-eyed. *sniff sniff*

Joan: Suck it up, kiddo. Before you know it, it will be time for the Emmy’s.

Sunday, March 07, 2010

Live Blogging the Academy Awards 2010 Red Carpet



It's officially the end of Award Show Season... Oscar! Oscar! Oscar! The stars are already arriving on the red carpet, so let's get to it.

 

Anna Kendrick.
This wasn't photographed properly -- 
but it's gorgeous on TV, 
and especially against the red carpet. 
Lovely draping, lovely details... well done. 

  

Mo'nique.
I like the color on her, but it's a little too form fitting 
to be flattering for her shape. 
As a fellow big girl, this is not something 
I'd choose to play up my curves.

 

Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon.
Mariah brought her two friends again. 
Love the color on her and the lines. 
But the slit it too damn high.


 

Vera Farmiga.
I know what you're gonna say -- this is too much dress. 
Maybe so, but I'm in love with this Marchesa gown. 


 

Amanda Seyfried.
This is lovely and appropriate for the evening.
It's too bad you can't see the glimmer and quite grab the color.


 

Zoe Saldana.
Ombre, what a mess.


 

Ryan Reynolds.
Yum.

  

Elizabeth Banks.
In Versace. Really pretty.


 

Maggie Gyllenhaal.
Um... Not loving this. At all.


 

Sandra Bullock.
Let's say this is a marked improvement 
from her past award show ensembles. 
Like the sleek hair and the shimmering gold. 
Not totally in love with it, but much improved.




Diane Kruger.
And we have a candidate for worst dressed. 


 

Carrie Mulligan.
Really pretty. I might have liked a 
floor-length hem, but this has great details. 

  

Sarah Jessica Parker.
Chanel. It's ... well... something. 




Penelope Cruz.
She always gets it right. 
But she actually looked better at the Globes.


 

Helen Mirren.
Damn. She is smokin' for her age. 
Always gets it right.




Rachel McAdams.
Love the lines, hate the print. 


 

Queen Latifah.
Love this. The color. The details. Gorg.


 

George Clooney.
God -- he looks older than just a few weeks ago.
This one's probably sucking the life right out of him.
Someone -- a fountain of youth -- QUICK!


 

Charlize Theron.
From this angle... gorg. 
From the front -- it looks like
two lavender hands cupping her breasts.


 

See???

 

Meryl Streep.
Finally, well dressed.