OOO, OOOOH

God, this is so sweet. And you know Dr. Phil is feeling pretty damn foolish right now. It don't take a rocket scientist to know how to pick out a mango.

Britney's Family: Dr. Phil Violated Trust

Britney Spears's family is accusing Dr. Phil McGraw of violating their trust by making public statements about his hospital visit with the troubled pop star and his call for her to receive therapy. Family spokesman Lou Taylor, a business manager for mother Lynne and daughter Jamie Lynn Spears, appeared on Wednesday's Today show and also said that at no time had the family planned to do a show with McGraw, despite his statements about such a program. (McGraw later said the scheduled episode would not go on as originally planned.) "It was decided it would be detrimental to ever do that," said Taylor, who described McGraw's request for such a show in the first place to be "self-serving." She also said that McGraw has now "compromised" Lynne and Jamie Lynn's relationship with Britney. [people]

Joan & Melissa Do the Globes

Melissa and I put on our prediction caps and discuss the film nominations for this year's Golden Globes... Tune in this Sunday to see who really won. ;)

Best Motion Picture - Drama
American Gangster
Atonement
Eastern Promises
The Great Debaters
Michael Clayton
No Country For Old Men
There Will Be Blood

JOAN : I'm thinkin' either No Country for Old Men or There Will Be Blood. (Moreso the former.)

MELISSA : No Country for Old Men will prob take it

MELISSA : although i'd love to see the Viggo flick, Eastern Promises win

JOAN : Neither of which I have a desire to see... but I love the actors in them

JOAN : of course you do, he does sit ups naked in it

MELISSA : i want to see Eastern, there is a minute total naked fight, viggo both frontal and behind nudity

JOAN : i knew that was the reason

JOAN : you're so transparent

MELISSA : you got me!

JOAN : lol

Best Performance by an
Actress in a Motion Picture - Drama
Cate Blanchett Elizabeth: The Golden Age
Julie Christie Away From Her
Jodie Foster The Brave One
Angelina Jolie A Mighty Heart
Keira Knightley Atonement

MELISSA : i say my girl, Angelina

JOAN: I was gonna say Keira... but after last night's Critic's Choice, I'm going with Julie Christie.

JOAN : Did anyone see that Jodie Foster movie???

JOAN : For some reason, I don't think Angie's gonna pull this one out

MELISSA : i dont think angie will win either

MELISSA : i dont think the movie got the recognition they thought it would

MELISSA : i didn't see that jodie foster movie.

MELISSA : did you?

JOAN : no. i don't know why. the book did very well.

JOAN : nope. and i won't.

JOAN : *yawn*

MELISSA : sayid is in it

JOAN : hmm. that might change my mind.

Best Performance by an
Actor in a Motion Picture - Drama
George Clooney Michael Clayton
Daniel Day-Lewis There Will Be Blood
James McAvoy Atonement
Viggo Mortensen Eastern Promises
Denzel Washington American Gangster

JOAN : well, i think we both know we're biased here.

MELISSA : uh.... dur... who do you think i want to win?!?!?

JOAN : who do u think I want to win?

JOAN : lol

MELISSA : right

JOAN : But it's definitely Day-Lewis

JOAN : The others might as well stay home. Um, wait -- they will be home.

MELISSA : they will. sucks for us

JOAN : totally

Best Motion Picture
- Musical Or Comedy
Across The Universe
Charlie Wilson's War
Hairspray
Juno
Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

MELISSA : i have no desire to see any of these

MELISSA : ESP hairspray

MELISSA : with that jarhead

JOAN : lofl. jarhead.

JOAN : i agree.

JOAN : and i bet that wins

MELISSA : ew

MELISSA : you think?

MELISSA : how awful if it does

JOAN : john travolta in drag looks like my sis in law

MELISSA : ouch

MELISSA : lol

JOAN : the truf hurts

MELISSA : it do

Best Performance by an
Actress in a Motion Picture
- Musical or Comedy
Amy Adams Enchanted
Nikki Blonsky Hairspray
Helena Bonham Carter Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
Marion Cotillard La Vie En Rose
Ellen Page Juno

JOAN : if marion cotillard doesn't win, she was robbed

MELISSA : hmmmm. no clue

MELISSA : i didn't see la vie

JOAN : they uglied her up but good

MELISSA : they do a good job of that

Best Performance by an
Actor in a Motion Picture -
Musical Or Comedy
Johnny Depp Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
Ryan Gosling Lars and the Real Girl
Tom Hanks Charlie Wilson's War
Philip Seymour Hoffman The Savages
John C. Reilly Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story

MELISSA : JOHNNY!!!!!

JOAN : how in the world did lars and the real girl get nominated?

MELISSA : omg, what a dumb premise for a flick?!?!?

MELISSA : how stoopit

JOAN : and to be critically acclaimed.

JOAN : ?

MELISSA : awful

JOAN : i agree, johnny. for his body of work.

MELISSA : all shit do not smell like roses, people

Best Performance by an
Actress In A Supporting Role in a Motion Picture
Cate Blanchett I'm Not There
Julia Roberts Charlie Wilson's War
Saoirse Ronan Atonement
Amy Ryan Gone Baby Gone
Tilda Swinton Michael Clayton

MELISSA : either cate or tilda.

MELISSA : but i think cate will take it

JOAN : i'm gonna say amy ryan

JOAN : just bec she won last night

MELISSA : did you see any of these?

JOAN : nope

MELISSA : me neither

Best Performance by an
Actor In A Supporting Role in a Motion Picture
Casey Affleck The Assassination Of Jesse James By The Coward Robert Ford
Javier Bardem No Country For Old Men
Philip Seymour Hoffman Charlie Wilson's War
John Travolta Hairspray
Tom Wilkinson Michael Clayton

JOAN : bardem

MELISSA : javiar

MELISSA : yup

JOAN : bingo.

MELISSA : i gotta see that flick

MELISSA : he's dating penelope

MELISSA : supposedly

JOAN : i know and the pics of them making out are HOT

MELISSA : LOL!

JOAN : jesus. they are def INTO each other

MELISSA : did you see the music video she made with her sister where they MAKE OUT?!?!

JOAN : way better match than TC

JOAN : THAT'S HER SISTER?

MELISSA : uh YEAH!

JOAN : ARE YOU SHITTING ME?

JOAN : ugh.

MELISSA : i'll find the link

JOAN : now, really... is that nece?

MELISSA : check it out!

JOAN : k, not only is it her sis. but it's in her bro's video

JOAN : ick

JOAN : just ick.

MELISSA : nasty

JOAN : god, u can hardly tell who's who...

JOAN : they look so much alike.

MELISSA : they look very much alike

MELISSA : yeah

MELISSA : good genes

JOAN : why why why would they do this????

MELISSA : i have no idea

MELISSA : that's beyond disgusting

JOAN : it's not just making out. as if that's not bad enough

JOAN : i have a totally different opinion of her now.

MELISSA : i think guys might like her even more now

MELISSA : lol

JOAN : well, sure.

JOAN : k. next topic

Best Director - Motion Picture
Tim Burton Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street
Ethan Coen, Joel Coen No Country For Old Men
Julian Schnabel The Diving Bell And The Butterfly
Ridley Scott American Gangster
Joe Wright Atonement

JOAN : coens

MELISSA : for sure!

The People's Choice Awards...

In case you were planning on watching the People's Choice Awards tonite and expecting a regular awards-type show... forget it:

According to Audiences Unlimited, due to the writer's strike, the audience for the 2008 People's Choice Awards show at The Shrine has been canceled; however, a revised version of Awards telecast will still air on CBS on January 8, 2008.

Wow

I got nuttin'. Let the report speak for itself:

Report: Britney Spoke in a British Accent at Hospital

In case you didn't know...

This is why we need them:

Striking television writers delivered David Letterman’s Top 10 list, “Demands of the Striking Writers,” on his show Wednesday:

10. “Complimentary tote bag with next insulting contract offer” — Tim Carvell, from “The Daily Show.”

9. “No rollbacks in health benefits, so I can treat the hypothermia I caught on the picket lines” — Laura Krafft, from “The Colbert Report.”

8. “Full salary and benefits for my imaginary writing partner, Lester” — Melissa Salmons, writer for daytime TV.

7. “Members of the AMPTP must explain what the hell AMPTP stands for” — Warren Leight, writer for “Law & Order: Criminal Intent.”

6. “No disciplinary action taken against any writer caught having inappropriate relationship with a copier” — Jay Katsir, from “The Colbert Report.”

5. “I’d like a date with a woman” — Steve Bodow, from “The Daily Show.”

4. “Hazard pay for breaking up fights on ‘The View”’ — from writer and director Nora Ephron.

3. “I’m no accountant, but instead of us getting 4 cents for a $20 DVD, how about we get $20 for a 4-cent DVD?” — Gina Johnfrido of “Law & Order.”

2. “I don’t have a joke. I just want to remind everyone that we’re on strike, so none of us are responsible for this lame list” — Chris Albers from Conan O’Brien’s “Late Night.”

1. “Producers must immediately remove their heads from their —–” — author Alan Zwiebel.

Taking what we can get...

Since the Globes are a no go, we're taking what we can get and watching the red carpet footage of The 13th Annual Critics' Choice Awards, airing tonite on VH1. I'm not quite sure why it's OK to attend this ceremony (and tomorrow night's People's Choice Awards, and not the Globes... Why can't they simply air the awards without any of that BS commentary and monologue crap?

Brangelina looking pensive and oh, so serious on the red carpet. Pitt sporting a new look -- and graying beard. Distinguished ;)

George Clooney goofing it up paps side. (Could he be more reminiscent of Cary Grant???) Sans chica...? Hmm... ;)

Kyra Sedgwick looking lovely in red. Fab dress!

She'd never be presenting if she weren't Mrs. Cruise.

Penn was sans the Mrs. Yet another Hollywood divorce.

The Pitt table was a popular stop during the commercial breaks.


Rumors of rockiness be damned, they still got it.

NOOOOOOOOO!

Give us a moment. Melissa and I are grieving... Award season is having a very bumpy go this year... The announcement just came down the wire... The Golden Globes committee has planned to not air the regular ceremony due to the writers' strike, which means no red carpet...

Golden Globe Awards organizers plan to abandon the televised formal ceremony this Sunday and replace it with a press-conference announcement of the winners, according to reports Monday. The drastic movie is in response to the Screen Actors Guild announcement that its members would not cross picket lines by the Writers Guild of America, effectively leaving the show without any stars. Instead of the lavish ceremony, the Hollywood Foreign Press Association will now announce the awards at a press conference broadcast on NBC, the Los Angeles Times and Deadline Hollywood Daily report. NBC also plans a Dateline special on the nominees and an hour-long show covering Hollywood parties, according to the reports, which cite an internal NBC memo. [people]

I'm going to have to medicate myself. Melissa, get me my purple pills.

Is she? Isn't she? SHE IS!

Finally, it's now OK to let the cat outta the bag. Just the other day, Nicole Kidman bailed out of a movie she was slated to film, and it added weight to the rumor she is with child. Today, People announced she is indeed pregnant:

Nicole Kidman and husband Keith Urban are expecting their first child, her rep confirms. "The couple are thrilled," Catherine Olim says in a statement. For Kidman, this will be her third child. She and her former husband, Tom Cruise adopted two children during their marriage: Isabella, now 15, and Connor, 12. As for where Kidman and Urban, who will be a first-time parent, may bring up their impending arrival, the couple, though both from Down Under, purchased a farm near Leipers Fork, Tenn., a half-hour southwest of Nashville, in 2007. [people]

Mama Spears still whoring hospital-laden daughter

It was Ma Spears who made the call to Dr Phil to come and visit BritBrit while she was in what was supposed to be a 72-hour mental lockdown. Not surprisingly Dr Phil's visit and involvement was supposed to be aired in an episode of his sucky-ass show tomorrow until somehow he came to his senses and decided to cancel the episode. Why Ma Spears would contact a media whore like Dr Phil himself is no surprise at all. Lynne Spears has been capitalizing on her daughters' lives in the public eye since the very beginning... the latest being selling Jamie Lynne's preggo story to OK! mag for a cool mil.

Dr. Phil says Lynne Spears initially called and asked him to intervene before Britney was released from L.A.'s Cedars-Sinai Medical Center Saturday.

"I want to set the record straight. I went to see Britney at the request of her family. I talked to Lynne, [father] Jamie and [brother] Brian because they were frustrated that she wasn't going to be held for a longer time," he said on CBS' The Early Show this morning.

Dr. Phil — who will devote a show to the singer this week — said he got looped in after Britney was initially rushed to the hospital.

"Thursday night, the phone rang, it was Lynne. Clearly she was very upset, as any parent would be," he said. "I was first contacted by her family a year ago and had maintained a running dialogue for the last year or so." [Us Weekly]

Wow, so he's not gonna cash in?

What's with the sudden moral decision not to air the BritBrit mental hospital lockdown eppy? Did Dr. Phil get all moral all of a sudden? Weird.

Dr. Phil McGraw has pulled his planned show dedicated to Britney Spears, he announced on his Web site Monday.

"As was widely reported this weekend, at the request of concerned family members, I visited Britney Spears in the hospital. The details of that visit will, of course, remain private," he said in a message online.

"We had planned to tape a Dr. Phil Now show today, focusing not on the tabloid side of Britney's latest problems, but instead on the very serious issues surrounding this case. Clearly, it is not just Britney's family struggling to find a way to protect adult children who cannot be ordered or compelled to seek help.

"Because the Spears situation is too intense at this time, and out of consideration to the family, I have made the decision not to move forward with the taping at this particular time."

"Britney and her family are in our prayers, and we ask that they be in yours." [People]

I can't decide...

Who does the baby take after more?
Yeah, definitely Tori.

oh, boy, oh, boy!

Andrew Morton, famed/hated biographer, is coming out with a tell-all on Tom Cruise and Scientology. He better watch his back. And his pocketbook. I smell a lawsuit and a possible 'silencing' heading his way soon.

Here are just a few of the shocking allegations Morton makes:

• Daughter by Katie Holmes "conceived like Rosemary's Baby"

• Nicole Kidman "feared blackmail" over sex tapes made with Scientologists...

Tom Cruise has become the de-facto second in command of the Church of Scientology, according to a new biography - which makes an extraordinary attack on the star by comparing his 20-month-old daughter Suri to the Devil's child in the film Rosemary's Baby.

...Cruise denies each of the claims vehemently, and Scientology lawyers are believed to be drawing up a lawsuit seeking £50million in compensation from Morton's publishers, St Martin's Press... Morton claims some "fanatical" Scientologists believed Suri Cruise was actually the result of a sperm donation by Scientology's dead founder, L. Ron Hubbard. Morton writes that Ms Holmes may feel she was in "the horror movie Rosemary's Baby, in which an unsuspecting young woman is impregnated with the Devil's child"....

"He has been told about it and naturally he knows there are a bunch of lies about him. You can imagine what it must be like to have someone compare your baby girl to Rosemary's Baby. Morton should be ashamed of himself....Morton's book paints a picture of a talented actor who tasted enormous success at a young age and then gradually became consumed by Scientology....
His involvement in Scientology began in 1986 when he was recruited by his first wife Mimi Rogers, a Scientologist who gave him some literature on the subject....Morton claims Scientologists pursued Cruise as part of a campaign to recruit celebrities. The author quotes former senior member Karen Pressley as saying: "A senior Scientology executive would be on the phone telling us that Emilio Estevez was staying in Malibu and that we had 48 hours to speak to him and get him in for an auditing session. There was so much heat and pressure on this it was outrageous." Cruise's recruitment was a coup for his wife Mimi but when their marriage began to fail in 1990 the hierarchy sided with him, according to Morton. He quotes a former Scientologist saying: "The impetus was to help Tom Cruise and within 24 hours they had agreed to split up."

Morton says David Miscavige sought to rebuild Scientology's reputation, battered by a fraud scandal in 1982. He invited Cruise to his "desert lair" in 1989, a 500-acre resort in Hemet, 90 miles from Los Angeles, nicknamed "Gold Base". Miscavige lives there with Scientology's most devoted followers called Sea Organisation or Sea Org. Morton claims the base was surrounded by security cameras, with "secret plans to rig the perimeter with homemade explosives in case of attack", as well as a "man-made eyrie where eagle-eyed guards with high-powered rifles fitted with telescopic sights scanned sunbaked California scrub for possible intruders".

According to Morton, the followers were not treated well. Miscavige, he says, was followed everywhere by an entourage "who slavishly tape-recorded his every utterance". Scientologists say Gold Base is simply home to their film studios and production facilities where the organisation's literature, videos and E-meters are made, and object strongly to Morton's characterisation of Miscavige, saying it is based on testimony disproved in court....

Scientology executives contributed to the failure of Cruise's marriage to Kidman, Morton implies. The author says that Cruise was asked in 1999 to do a "Potential Trouble Source/Suppressive Person course...designed to anchor an individual's faith while pinpointing those in his life who create problems". Morton claims Scientologists were worried that Kidman might be a problem because her father was a psychologist - "which automatically made her a Potential Trouble Source" - and she had given an interview emphasising her roots as a Catholic.

"The fear was that a lukewarm Nicole could fatally compromise Tom's commitment to his faith," Morton writes. "Somehow Tom had to be inoculated against the virus of doubt. "The surefire cure for scepticism was the Potential Trouble Source/ Suppressive Person course, which reinforced wavering Scientologists' loyalty while making them more suspicious of those around them who were not members of the faith."

When Cruise decided to leave Nicole in 2000, she was worried that she might not be able to see the two children the couple had adopted. Morton quotes a former highranking Scientologist claiming he received a call from Kidman's lawyer Bill Beslow: "At this point Nicole hated Scientology but was concerned for the kids. "She did not want to ruin her relationship with them. I told the lawyer if she wants to stay with the children she will have to be quiet and not speak out about Scientology."

In particular, Morton claims she was worried about her "audit" tapes, which contained details of her sex life and which she feared might be leaked if she spoke out. Morton recounts allegations that "auditing" focuses on the subject's sex life. He quotes Hubbard's son, Ronald De Wolf, who fell out with his father, giving a Playboy interview: "You have complete control of someone if you have every detail of his sex life and fantasy life on record. In Scientology the focus is on sex. Sex, sex, sex. "The first thing we wanted to know about someone we were auditing was his sexual deviations. All you've got to do is find a person's kinks, whatever they might be. "Their dreams and their fantasies. Then you can fit a ring through their noses and take them anywhere. You promise to fulfil their fantasies or you threaten to expose them."

Morton says Karen Pressley was at Gold Base one evening when John Travolta's sexuality was openly discussed. He writes: "'It made my head spin,' she recalls, 'and made me realise that the idea of confidentiality was a chimera.' As another Scientology executive admitted bluntly, 'These files come in handy if they want to blackmail you'."

Cruise's attempts at new relationships, with actresses Penelope Cruz and Sofia Vergara, did not work out....Morton claims: "It was on this trip that Sofia realised Tom was never alone. Everywhere he went, he was surrounded by Scientologists. They were at his home, they were in his car, they were at the restaurant. They were never short of smiles, but she found them 'powerful and authoritarian'. "One friend told me, 'She met his children, there is no doubt he was auditioning her for the part of his wife.' Sofia told friends she had been deliberately targeted not only as a possible bride for Tom, but as a high-profile Scientology recruit who would be an alluring figurehead for a future recruitment drive in Latin America."...

Of the bizarre beliefs Morton ascribes to some Scientologists about Cruise's third wife, Katie Holmes, whom the actor married in a whirlwind romance, the author says, incredibly: "Some Sea Org fanatics even wondered if the actress had been impregnated with Hubbard's frozen sperm. [daily mail/uk]

Is she serious?

Girl, you need to get down off that high horse... come back down to reality. Unreal.

Pop singer Fergie has likened herself to Diana, Princess Of Wales - believing she appeals to the public in exactly the same way....She maintains her innate capacity to relate to people across the world echoes that of the late British royal's, whose sensitivity and charm won the hearts of millions worldwide. She says, "People put celebrities on a pedestal and act like they're perfect. But I'm more like the people's artist - the same way Diana was 'the people's princess.' I'm a little more human than other artists. I'm not afraid to show my flaws."

Joan just shakes her head in disgust.

Kudos to flynet for that friggin heelarious pic. ;)

In more Spears-family news

This is interesting. Probably BS, but interesting nonetheless. There are rumors that Jaime Lynn's bf didn't knock her up, but he's being paid off to say he did the deed:

BRITNEY Spears' family dramas have taken a fresh twist, with reports that Casey Aldridge is not the father of teenage mum-to-be Jamie Lynn's baby, but has been paid to protect the real man's identity.

It has been alleged the 16-year-old actress - who announced she is expecting her first child with long-term boyfriend Aldridge earlier this month - was having an affair with an older man on the set of her Nickelodeon TV show Zoey 101. The Spears family are allegedly desperate to keep the man's identity a secret, and have paid Aldridge to pretend to be the father instead. A source told America's Star magazine: "Casey is being paid off to be the family's fall guy while the real father remains unidentified. "The man many suspect is the father, however, would face rape charges and probably prison time if he were to come forward and admit he had sex with Jamie Lynn."..."Jamie Lynn has dated Casey on-and-off over the past two years. But it was not steady. Jamie Lynn went through a time of partying, and Casey was just a part of that." [herald sun/au]

Oh, dear God

What is his f@@@ing problem? He thinks his brickhead is gonna solve this? Not to mention he's just cashing in on her problems -- just like everyone else. So, real honorable and charitable, there blockhead. Suckah please.

Dr. Phil McGraw – who met Britney Spears at Cedars-Sinai hospital Saturday – will devote his Monday taping to the pop star's problems. The show will air Tuesday. The syndicated talk-show host and therapist says he talked to Spears as she was leaving the facility, where she was held on a mental lockdown after a custody dispute. She was released after just a day and a half from a possible 72-hour stay. [WHICH IS BS BTW -- IF SHE WEREN'T BRITBIRT HER ASS WOULDA HAD TO STAY IN THE FULL 72 HOURS. SPECIAL TREATMENT RUNS RAMPANT IN LA. SICKENING. --ED] In a statement to Entertainment Tonight, McGraw said: "My meeting with Britney and some family members this morning in her room at Cedars leaves me convinced more than ever that she is in dire need of both medical and psychological intervention. "She was released moments before my arrival and was packing when I entered the room. We visited for about an hour before I walked with her to her car." Still, a source tells PEOPLE that McGraw "talked to both Britney and [father] Jamie about how her being released was one of the worst decisions that could have been made." The source says they packed up within 10 minutes. [people]

Way to kick off 2008!

Guess New Year's resolutions mean nothing to BritBrit... She's on a 72-hour lockdown in a mental ward due to her most recent breakdown. It's pretty certain now she will lose all rights to her children. What was once just bizarre behavior is now the sad implosion of celebrity gone wrong and it's happening right in front of everyone's eyes.

Britney Spears was placed on lockdown for a mental evaluation Friday after the pop star locked herself in a room with one of her children at her L.A. home and refused to hand him over to ex-husband Kevin Federline. A source tells PEOPLE it was the pop star's court-appointed child monitor who called police. "She had already put Preston in the car when Britney locked herself in a room with Jayden," says the source. "The cops came and got through the door and tied her down to a gurney." Spears, who according to police appeared to be "under the influence of an unknown substance," was rushed to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, where the source says she will be on a minimum of a 72-hour lock down for mental evaluation. The evaluation, known as a "5150 Hold," is, according to the medical code, "When any person, as a result of mental disorder, is a danger to others, or to himself or herself, or gravely disabled." The "mobile crisis team" is able to make this recommendation in writing and take a patient be evaluated and treated. [people]

Read more here.

Da ring...

I wonder how much meth that rock can score? (Oh, so evil. Yes. I know.)

Janet's Shaped Up Again

...but looking more and more like LaToya than ever. (What's with the slutty pics...???)

La Lohan gets freaky clubside

Lindsay had quite a New Year's Eve in Italy... She finds Italian men quite hard to resist... Well, who doesn't really? I mean, this may be one time you can't blame the girl for slutting it up... ;)

LiLo used a trip to Italy (where she picked up an award for her, um, outstanding movie career at the Capri Hollywood Film Festival) to reportedly make out with three men in 24 hours...But only one made it to the final round, which took place in Lindsay's hotel room. The winner was a certain Dario Faiella, who was spotted the next morning with a nearly naked Linds on her balcony. No need to remember the name, though—we're not expecting to hear from him ever again. [eonline blog]

Indy Fans Unite

For those of you excited for the upcoming installment in the Indiana Jones saga, you'll wanna pick up the next issue of Vanity Fair... Here's a sneak peek: