I'm beginning to think that Jessica Simpson is the new Winona Ryder. Meaning, she's sucking the life out of every talented man she crosses paths with... (I'm talking to you Zach Braff). Now, she's on to soil the image of guitarist/singer/songwriter John Mayer. I mean, what could they possibly have in common? What? Does she regale him with talk of bra shopping and spray-on tans? Does her silly faces and clip-on hair attachments really get his juices flowing? Can it be as simple as "MMM, I got me some of that?" God, I hope so. And if that's the case, John -- do it, get it over with and move the fuck on.... Look at him (above) -- all white and pasty -- as if she's draining him of his life's blood... Sickly and diminished in appearance, I'm sure his talent will be next! Jesus H Christ -- SOMEONE STOP HER!!!
John Mayer's official website crashed yesterday, after the Grammy Award winner reportedly posted a mysterious message related to his new relationship with Jessica Simpson. ...The singer simply had written "I'm really enjoying this song" and posted an image of Public Enemy's album cover for their song "Don't Believe The Hype". ...News broke about the budding relationship between the stars, who are both suffering from a bought of laryngitis, on Tuesday....Simpson is reportedly telling friends she is in love with the singer. A source close to Mayer tells Us Weekly, "They've only gotten together a handful of times over the last few weeks. But yes, they've made out." A Simpson source tells the magazine that the couple have yet to consummate their new relationship. [imdb]
"The two singers have known each other for several years and last year both attended Clive Davis's pre-Grammys party in Beverly Hills. Although Simpson has been linked to Jared Leto and her Employee of the Month costar and Teen Choice Awards cohost Dane Cook, Simpson has not officially dated anyone since her November 2005 separation from Nick Lachey." [People]
Sidebar:
Even the public agrees this couple is not palatable (According to a People Mag poll):
| Are Jessica and John a good match? |
| Yes |   | 19% |
| No | | 81% |
I'm beginning to think that Jessica Simpson is the new Winona Ryder. Meaning, she's sucking the life out of every talented man she crosses paths with... (I'm talking to you Zach Braff). Now, she's on to soil the image of guitarist/singer/songwriter John Mayer. I mean, what could they possibly have in common? What? Does she regale him with talk of bra shopping and spray-on tans? Does her silly faces and clip-on hair attachments really get his juices flowing? Can it be as simple as "MMM, I got me some of that?" God, I hope so. And if that's the case, John -- do it, get it over with and move the fuck on.... Look at him (above) -- all white and pasty -- as if she's draining him of his life's blood... Sickly and diminished in appearance, I'm sure his talent will be next! Jesus H Christ -- SOMEONE STOP HER!!!
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3 comments:
That's a great sign!
Johnny
Lovely to see that John Mayer is such a friggin' hypocrite. He was all about making "Room for Squares" in his debut album, and now he's choosing an orange tan and big hooters over brains and inner beauty? Pah-lease! I can never take him seriously, after this.
ain't that the truth! he's on notice, starting now.
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