It's about time we jumped on this bandwagon. The existence of Suri Cruise is turning out to be debatable, at best, and most likely a big 'ol case of 'that kid ain't real' at even better than best. It's a gossip monger's wet dream. This story just keeps getting better with age.Why on Earth would a couple who practically had sex with each other on every red carpet the world over keep everyone from seeing pictures of their newborn? Especially when every aspect of their relationship was for public consumption? Why is it that they are now so very private? Shit, right after the birth of Suri -- Katie was rushed to the premiere of MI3 with the umbilical cord still attached. So, the BS excuses they’re selling us for not coughing up the baby pictures just won't suffice.
And, it's not just Tom's adoring fans that are being shut out. Fellow Scientologists, John Travolta and Kelly Preston, as well as good friends Will and Jada Pinkett-Smith have not seen this child. So, three months have passed and the only one to gain entry into the Cruise compound is.... drum roll please... Leah Remini. of King of Queens fame. Oh, suckah please. Who even knew they were friends? Leah said the most bizarre thing about the baby, something no one would think to mention after seeing someone's child for the first time: "She's a newborn and normal size!" Um, WTF? If that's not a Freudian Slip, then I don't know what is. Why wouldn't she be a newborn, unless she wasn't born in April? And why wouldn't she be of normal size, unless she's not a newborn? Mind-boggling.
In case you didn't know, Leah is a ... wait for it ... Scientologist. Who, was outted on the Stern show some time back. During that appearance, we learned an interesting tidbit about Scientology childrearing practices. Leah, because of her religious beliefs, chose not to breastfeed her child. Here's more info into this practice from a Scientology-stance:
“Hubbard also wrote that breastfeeding should be avoided (in contravention of common medical advice, which stresses its importance for the health of both the mother and the child[34]). As an alternative, Hubbard offered a concoction which he called the "Barley Formula", made from barley water, homogenized milk, and corn syrup or honey. Hubbard claims that "I picked it up in Roman days." [35] However, this formula is potentially unsafe; honey can cause infant botulism when given to infants under twelve months of age.[36][37][38] Apart from safety issues, the formula would lack vital nutrients, IgA antibodies, and other components of human breast milk.” [Wikipedia]
What we've got ourselves here folks is a good, old-fashioned hoax. There's no baby. Or if there is, it ain't their biological child. And I bet what they ordered ain't what they got. And these three months of seclusion have been spent trying to figure out how to make the public sign this deed.
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4 comments:
Well compiled and well presented, Joan! Amen to it all. The kid don't exist, yo.
I've been in J&M withdrawal! Excellent post! I remember the nursing bra pic, but had forgotten that nursing is a no-no for Scientologists. BTW, just how long after the "birth" was the MI3 premiere? Because I know that after I had my first child, I was so in pain and so tired that the only place I went for almost a month afterward was to my parents house (only a few miles away) for my dad's birthday.
thank you, melissa :)
i think it was only a matter of days, maybe a week or two. definitely less than a month... i know the baby was born and he was on a press junket right after. nothing stopped him from stealing the spotlight. yick.
Me thinks you guys are conspiracy theorists. This child is being kept from public view as she is to be raised in a perfectly normal Thetan environment; she will be guided into modeling under the tutelage of Mugatu and is destined to save the world when she discards George W the Fourth minutes before he were to push the Red Button!
Johnny
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