This may have just put me off cake

I've never not wanted to eat cake...until now.

When it comes to birthdays, no one celebrates like Eva Longoria-Parker! The Desperate Housewives star extended her 33rd birthday into a wild weekend of fun in Miami. The hit of the party? A Vanilla Rum flavored cake by Edda's Cake Designs bearing her likeness!...On Saturday, March 15, a baker and an artist worked on the cake for three hours using a photo supplied by Eva's camp as inspiration. [star mag]

Ugh. You hafta know the people who attended this party did not think this was cute and gritted their teeth while chomping down on that sucker. I just could not handle being this chick's friend.

Oh, Melissa -- for my birthday cake this year -- can you have the folks at Edda's Cake Designs recreate a scene of me putting my foot in LongWhoria's ass? Thanks much :)