Coo Coo for Cocoa Puffs

Ok, Matt is batshit insane -- it's official. He smoke too much the ganga. He's got greed for the weed. He has toked his last smoke. Here's what he had to say about the birth of his child...

"We found a great rhythm. Contractions started kicking in. I sat there with her, right between her legs. We got tribal on it, we danced to it! I was DJ-ing this Brazilian music. I have it all chronicled. Becoming a dad is something I've dreamed of doing since I was 10. Becoming a father felt very, very natural. We were jamming! She was sweating. No painkiller, let's go. I said to her, 'Let's handle this - let's stay in the rhythm. Don't let the contraction be more than you'. We ended up having an epidural because, on the large contractions, the umbilical cord was being compressed. They went in and tried the vacuum. This is where I learned - and no one tells you this - but having a baby is a bloody, pukey, sweaty, primeval thing! And I mean that as a beautiful thing. It is wild. But the vacuum didn't work, and the doctor said, 'C-section.' I cut the umbilical cord and I said, 'Come here, little man. I saw the pecker and screamed that we'd been right all along about him being a boy." [stuff.co.nz]

Put the pipe down, man!