Coming to America

No one should be shocked. This was inevitable. When TomKat and PoshBecks hitched their wagons to one another, it was only a matter of time before someone crossed the pond. And, PoshBecks didn't let any time get wasted... This week, it was announced that Posh and Becks would be coming to America (mainly because his career is in shambles in England and he has to go where he's wanted). So, who did Becks turn to for career advice?

"Former England captain David Beckham sought the advice of his actor friend Tom Cruise before agreeing his big-money move from Real Madrid to Los Angeles Galaxy worth $1 million a week over five years. "I was on the phone to him (Cruise) for about an hour last night and an hour the night before," Beckham told reporters on Friday. "Obviously I asked him for his advice because he is a very wise man and a very good friend of mine. It's going to be a big help for us to have friends when we arrive in LA." Beckham, who announced on Thursday that he would be joining Major League Soccer side the Galaxy in August, appeared via satellite from Madrid at a Los Angeles news conference." [sports illustrated]

Oh, you didn't know that Cruise is an expert on soccer? Yeah... in addition to his vast knowledge about psychiatry and piss-poor acting, he's a bona fide go-to guy on all things soccer. Suckah please... how many people are going to be suckered in by this guy? I mean, we al know Posh and Becks are not the brightest bulbs, but still -- WHO THE FUCK GOES TO TOM CRUISE FOR SPORTS CAREER ADVICE? I mean, if you want advice on being fuckall crazy and batshit insane... Tom's your man... But soccer? No.